12ish Feelings

How to Keep Your Little Girl from Feeling Big

Photo Jul 11, 5 32 18 PM

Tallest person in the class? A women’s body by 10? Period at 9? Sound familiar? Most likely not…

Childhood can be a struggle for a variety of reasons, but one of the hardest parts for me was being a small person in a big person’s body. So when I was approached recently by a close friend whose little girl was feeling self-conscious in her new bathing suit, it made me think about how to navigate these waters today.

Photo Jul 11, 5 32 18 PM

Especially with summer here, it is really easy for little girls to feel out of place when they don’t look like their friends. Swimsuit shopping was a particularly difficult time for me as a little girl because I was anything but little. My 5ft 10″ body did not fit into the cutesy little suits that my friends were romping around in. I was always lead to the women’s section where I picked out the best of the worst. The brightest of the modest suits because the other thing I had to avoid was looking too old…too sexual.

The offerings on the market are so much better today so I think that problem has fixed itself, but the issue of being the only one in your group of friends whose thighs rub together, or whose stomach doesn’t have a tiny little six pack, is still a real one.


1. Watch Your Own Self-Talk

Our daughters are watching us. Passing along our own insecurities is a tough thing to have to police because our reactions to our own bodies are sometimes just a habit or even so subconscious that we don’t know we’re doing it. Passing a mirror and sighing, pitching your thigh fat, or just simply saying “I have got to lose weight” are easy things she hears and may start to mimic.


2. Show Her Instagram

One resource I definitely wish I had access to as a child is Instagram because it would have allowed me to see women that I could aspire to be like that were more my body type. It is so essential that she does not feel alone.


3. Get Her a Cool Suit!

If she is not going to fit into those little tiny brands, head to ASOS, Forever 21, or another fast-fashion chain. You will have to scour through racks of racy suits, but in-between there are some really cool ones that feel youthful, but are still age appropriate.


4. Treat Her Like a Child

Remember to treat her the age that she is. Because of her physicality, the world will start to treat her much older than she is and she might even start acting older because of this. It’s important you treat her as a little girl. Her size will start to trick others into making her an adult too soon, so make sure she knows she is still small even though she might be big.

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